"Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot"

"All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl."

"Nothing is permanent in this wicked world - not even our troubles."

"Actors search for rejection. If they don't get it they reject themselves."

"Failure is unimportant. It takes courage to make a fool of yourself."

"I don't believe that the public knows what it wants; this is the conclusion that I have drawn from my career."

"You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view."

"A modern U.S. Navy cruiser now requires 26 tons of manuals. This is enough to affect the vessel's performance."

"Illusion is the first of all pleasures."

"Time is fun when you're eating flies."

"Let's just say I was testing the bounds of society. I was just curious."

"Nothing in education is so astonishing as the amount of ignorance as it accumulates in the form of inert facts."